I can’t speak to your specific situation, but I can tell you that I have heard so many clients express this same fear to me. It’s a very common experience early in your healing journey with DID. And it’s easy to see why you might worry about this if you experience things like:
- people are telling you that you had entire conversations with them that you don’t remember
- you find clothes in your closet that you don’t recognize.
- you hear voices in your head that seem to be talking to you or about you.
- you find notes in your possessions in a handwriting that isn’t yours.
These are just a few examples of experiences people with DID can have. These experiences could be particularly baffling and frightening if the person doesn’t have any idea that they might have DID. As disturbing as it might be to think you might have DID, at least it explains a lot. And having DID means it’s very unlikely that you are actually are “crazy” or going “crazy.” At the end of this video, I’ve got a resource to share with you that addresses this worry.
Two Other Common Worries
There are two other concerns that are common. One is “I must be imagining this.” Well, it’s possible to imagine many things, but finding possessions you don’t remember buying or being told by multiple people you had conversations you don’t remember makes it unlikely you are imagining the odd things you are experiencing.
The other thing some people worry about is “I must be making this up.” This is a cousin of “I must be imagining this.” People who say this are worried that they don’t really have DID. Instead, they worry that they have tricked everyone into believing they have it, including themselves! No one has ever had an explanation for why they might do this, though. And, again, how did you make up clothes in your closet that you don’t remember buying? Or people who seem to know you by a different name?
These worries commonly cycle
If you have been worrying that maybe you are going crazy (or must be imagining this or must be making it up), it’s probably not the last time you’ll have this worry. In my experience, people who are coming to understand they have DID and starting to work on the healing cycle through these doubts multiple times. It’s very understandable why they do.
A Resource
To help you get an idea if you’re going “crazy” or really might have DID, I’ve put together a free mini-course over at the CommuniDID website. You’ll find it at https://www.communidid.com/mighthavedid/
Have you ever experienced these types of worries? How have you been able to reassure yourself? I hope you’ll share in the comments below.